I’ve wanted to be a Mom all my life, and growing up, aside from my own Mother, I knew exactly who I wanted to model my future style of Motherhood after. I would watch this person and say, “I want to be just like that for my kids one day!”
To me, she is the epitome of what a woman, mother, and role model should be.

(I’ll give you a hint: she’s a singer!)

Have you ever heard the phrase of advice: “Be a Mary, not a Martha?”

In my Motherhood journey, I’ve been advised this several times. I’ve been reminded to be more like one than the other.

In case you aren’t familiar with it, there is a story from the Bible about two sisters, Mary and Martha:

LUKE 10:38-42

“Now as they went on their way, Jesus entered a village. And a woman named Martha welcomed Him into her house.
She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet and listened to His teaching.
But Martha was distracted with much serving. She went up to Him and said,
‘Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Tell her then to help me.’
But the Lord answered her, “Martha, Martha, you are anxious and troubled about many things,
but one thing is necessary. Mary has chosen the good portion, which will not be taken away from her.”


There are tons of teachings on this one story in the Bible, and so many viewpoints on what
we should take from it—especially as women, and, in my opinion, even more so as Moms.

Martha was the doer.
There were people coming in and out of the house that day, and food being made, and dishes piling up…
and just like a Mom, she was the engine of the airplane—quietly roaring and keeping everything running smoothly in the house.
I know you can relate—I know I can relate—to rushing about trying to keep the house from going up in smoke
and guests happy and welcomed and looking over to see your helper sitting on their butt.
I’m a Martha by nature. I get Martha. We just can’t let our houses go to heck, ya know??! Jeez!

But you see, Mary was the listener.
She was able to put the work aside because she recognized what was truly important in that moment.
She knew WHO was important. I gotta tell ya, being a Mary does not come easy to me.
I LOVE my children and wouldn’t trade spending time with them for anything,
but it has taken intentional self-training to be able to stop what I’m doing and
bend down to talk to them, or go sit on the floor and play with them,
or take the time to interpret their crying instead of rushing through it.

And now, to the singer!


… obviously from the Sound of Music.

I used to watch this movie and just want to hang out with her!!!

The children adore her. Why?

  1. She bought life.

Wherever Maria went, she turned it upside-down in a positive way.
She questioned. She knew when to work and when to play.
She did not go with the flow, which by definition, would mean she was truly living.
When our children have Mothers that are full of life, they will be more confident.

  1. She brought joy.

How amazing does music make everyone feel? Singing is even scientifically proven to lower stress levels.
The saying goes, “If Momma’s happy, everyone’s happy.” And it’s so true. We set the tones in our homes,
and I love that Maria carried joy around with her that was passed on to the children through song and positivity.
She taught them how to find the good.
When our kids see us positively coping, they will naturally pick up that critical skill.

  1. She carried her faith with her.

I believe one’s faith is the cornerstone to their well-being, and as a nun,
Maria held that faith with her during her journey and it’s what truly saw her through.
She turned directly to God during adversity. When our children see us turn to God,
they will model that, and that is, by far, the best place they could ever turn.

  1. She softened the harshness of the world.

Maria softened the harshness of both the world and the home…
both the war situation and political state of their country, but the father’s nature as well!
And I didn’t say sheltered. I said softened.
Maria never shielded the Von Trapp children from reality, but she gave them that safe place to go for some reprieve.
And she wasn’t afraid to tell the Dad to simmer down!
She was the voice of the children when they couldn’t be their own. She stood in the gap.
When our children have, regardless of their age, the security in knowing someone–their Mother–has their back,
they will be better people.

  1. And most importantly, she believed in herself.

My favorite trait of Maria’s is that she faced her fears head-on. She sang about having ‘confidence in confidence.’
What an AWESOME thing to pass on to our children. When our children see us believe in ourselves,
they will learn to believe in themselves just the same.

And we know good and well that children don’t always copy what you say,
but they always copy what you do.

I truly believe, in summary, that the traits of Maria
are exactly what our children need from us, their Mothers.

At this point in my life, I know that all three women’s roles are equally important and equally valuable in their teachings.
And as I continue on my journey as a Mom, I strive to be like all of them.


Maria will always be my favorite.

For good reasons, no?

Pop yourself some popcorn and pop in the movie, and get some fresh inspiration for your Motherhood.

And I mean, for goodness sake,
what child doesn’t love “raindrops on roses, and whiskers on kittens??” 🙂


  • Maggie

    Im so happy I read this, I tend to get caught up in house work and forget my little people. Just the other day I was busy cleaning up the kitchen after supper and my son was having a melt down and acting up, at first I got frustrated, all I wanted to do was get the dishwasher going but then something just clicked in and I relized that he was just looking for attention. So i dropped everything and sat and played with him and he was content and we enjoyed our time together! So, thank you for this reminder! 😊

    May 12, 2017 at 10:43 pm Reply
    • the Star Spangled Mama

      This happens to me too, especially when I get caught up in housework and what not! I loved your sweet comment, Mag- you’re the best! And you are an absolutely INCREDIBLE Mom. <3

      August 16, 2017 at 2:03 pm Reply
  • mamawella

    I love this! I always feel guilty hearing that scripture because I agree with you. I am Martha in so many ways and I always have to remind myself to be in the present. Maria on the other hand, I admire her and I always hope to be so optimistic like her.
    I love this post. It’s so fitting for Mother’s day. You’re a wonderful mama and God knows that! Stay sweet and loving!

    May 12, 2017 at 1:27 am Reply
    • the Star Spangled Mama

      You always say the sweetest things, Sister. You are a phenomenal Mom- God definitely has His hand on you, lady! <3

      August 16, 2017 at 2:06 pm Reply

    What are your thoughts on this?


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